It's been a while since I've written anything, so I decided it was time to do a brief life recap. Not that recapitulation is ever brief. It's not so much that I've had some kind of incredible experience, but I've learned a few things along the way.
I just finished my third semester of college, and I'm officially half way done with my Undergraduate. I think it's safe to say, my life is in a place I never expected it would be. I left high school and headed to college with a plan. I had the whole thing - who, what, where, when, why. In the last three semesters, I can't really plan past when the next time is I will eat Chipotle. However, I'm slowly beginning to understand the benefits of not having a "plan."
The "plan" for college students is usually as follows - they go to college to get a "marketable" degree, in which they pass with adequate, but not spectacular grades, and enjoy their free time on various illegal substances and have one night stands they don't remember, then they date someone the majority of their Undergraduate, and leave engaged. They then leave happily ever after with intentions to get married and to go into corporate America, where money and success are "guaranteed." Don't get me wrong - there are so many people that go and get a "marketable" degree, but have incredible grades and make better choices. However, I speak with the bias of attending the #1 party school, so hear me out.
In a way, I've always had a plan too. Study art history, do amazing, go to graduate school in New York. No matter what, the end game has always been New York. I would be lying if I said I have never been called selfish for putting my goals first. In a way, I suppose I am selfish. Or maybe, my plan is just different. It's different because I don't know what the intermediary is before New York. I have to say, the whole thing can be a bit frustrating - to live in the unknown, to lose things along the way, to be stubborn in your ways, which could lead to failure.
However, I've realized my "plan" is one I wish more people followed, in a way that was more specific to their lives. Let me digress - I saw "Her" today. The movie is about a futuristic society in which people are no longer able to satisfy each other, and people fall in love with their "operating systems," because they are the product of the user's imagination, therefore making them true to the user's every hope and dream. The main character, Theodore, fell in love with Samantha. Theodore is recently divorced, and as his ex-wife points out, is unable to handle real emotions and people, making his computer, Samantha, perfect. Samantha is more a computer. She uses Theodore, and all of the other users of her computer system, to explore the world. All Samantha wants to do see everything and know everything by experiencing all of the world, and therefore understanding who she is. Through this, she teaches Theodore who he is in love with, and who he is also.
I think we are all similar to Samantha, but we miss that in our contingency to the "plan." I myself, will admit openly, that I am Samantha. I spend my life experiencing the disease of wanderlust. All I want to do is travel the world and explore, and to find so much more that is outside not only of geography, but outside of myself. I want to see everything and learn about the world, but I also want to learn about myself. More importantly, maybe I just want to find myself. To do that, I want to fall in love with the world around me, and experience all that there is.
In this way, I'm grateful I don't have a "plan." It has its frustrations, I'll be honest. Whether it's the consistent questioning of what's next, the poking and prodding from friends and family about why I'm single or what life choices I'm making, and on and on. However, I'm thankful that I may wander as I please. In a matter of three semesters, I'm going to be set free to graduate school for many years, in which I essentially get to do nothing but travel the world and learn.
I wish for all of you that you would let go of your plan. Don't get engaged too early. Don't stop in the next state over when you could see the world. Don't get a C when you're capable of an A. At the same time, enjoy all the other trivial things. Have a piece of cake, or the entire burrito, or the fancy cup of coffee, or the frivolous things. Life is meant to be enjoyed. Life is too short. As colloquial as that is, time flies. There's so much to experience.
At the end of the day, I'm grateful to be Samantha, and I can't wait to continue to move on and explore. I can't wait to see everything up close and in person, rather than behind a screen at 1400 pixels. I can't wait to capture the world through my eyes with my camera as I want to remember it. I can't wait to write about my journey and all the things I see. I can't wait to fall in love with the world, and maybe in the end, find myself somewhere in a far away land. In an ideal world, I hope to teach "Theodore" who he is as well. I hope my wanderlust is an inspiration for change and new explorations.
I hope the world is ready for my wanderlust.
