The other night I was with two of my high school friends. They are sophomores who started dating when they were freshmen. I've known the guy for years as he goes to my church, and I just recently started to become good friends with his girlfriend. As I drove them to their respective houses, when we got to the girls house, I instructed the guy to get out and go say goodbye to his girlfriend. I watched them get out of the car, as they grabbed hands and ran to the front door, I saw this smile and this look in their eyes that I will never forget. They preceded to say their goodbyes, and as I sat in my car and watched, I realized that for as young as they are, they know what love is.
Adults tend to take love quite seriously. No, I do not believe love is something that can be taken lightly. Adults tend to make "I love you" a phrase that is high and mighty above all others. One that can only be reached after months and months of patience and learning. One that can not be retracted. One that binds you to a person for eternity. One inflicting consequence. Adults believe the so called love that high school and college age students isn't real. They claim it is nothing more than a hormonal instinct based on obligations to say phrases inspired by societal norms.
Not to be contradictory, but yes, there are some people who don't understand love and its significance. We all know that one person who's been dating someone an hour and they decide they're in love, only to break up two days later. That's not love, that's just stupid. Anyways, I digress.
But what if the young kids have it right? What if love is that state of abandon? The state where it is you and the other person live in freedom. Freedom to experience emotions and expression and care. Freedom from the constraints of adulthoods. Freedom from the serious and cynical experience that jades us all form love. The vulnerability to be your true self with someone else and share life. A state of reckless abandon.
What if that unmitigated love that young ones model for us is the thing we spend our entire lives looking for? What if we let go of the constraints society puts on love and just let our feelings run? What if that unmitigated emotion we allowed ourselves to experience when we were young was the emotion we modeled the remainder of our love life off of? What if that unmitigated high school experience is the one you spend your life searching for after its lost? What if it comes back to you?
Let the resilient joy and vulnerability of that love just exist. Don't question it or push it away. Trust it. It's there for a reason. When you're scared and you run, remember you can always run back. If they love you, they'll be there waiting for you.
“Love demands everything, they say, but my love demands only this: that no matter what happens or how long it takes, you'll keep faith in me, you'll remember who we are, and you'll never feel despair.”
― Ann Brashares, My Name Is Memory
― Ann Brashares, My Name Is Memory
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